Joy

"Joy is the feeling of grinning inside."
~ Melba Colgrove

What makes a person happy? How is it that some people can find the joy in the smallest of things and others have a bank account that would make King Midas envious and are miserable?

I'm at at a bowling party for one of my daughters' friends. The girls are on the verge of middle school. They are having a good time but are constantly aware that everyone is watching them. They stay in-tune for cues from their friends that they are still staying cool. They notice the boys in the next lane and straighten their hair and giggle just a little bit more. 

It's almost sad to watch them heading into adulthood at lightning speed. Knowing the hurdles they face. Realizing that with the good times there are usually an equal amount of painful ones. That some of these friends will fall to the wayside due to fights over a boy or a misplaced word.

And then down the alley is a large group of handicapped people. Autistic, retarded; I'm not sure of the politically correct term nowadays. They don't care one bit what they are wearing or if someone is watching them. They aren't hitting every pin. Sometimes they don't even hit one.

Each one has their own unique style an it is fascinating. Just to be able to let go and have fun regardless must be a great feeling. There is no competition. Everyone cheers no matter who is bowling.  There is a look of pure joy and happiness shining through their smiles.  Watching them makes me happy and also makes me feel like I'm holding myself back from true happiness.

What makes us "normal" people different? Do those few extra chromosomes include jealousy, vanity and cruelty?  Why do we care so much what other people think?  What makes us give control of our happiness and confidence to others?  When do we start "learning" this?  How do we supress this instinct long enough to be happy? 

So, we have to choose to take the bindings off that keep us from joy.  However it is that we are built, whether it is learned or instinctive, has given us this ability to make that choice.  If we continue to stay unhappy, we now have put that responibility on our own shoulders.  Whether it is from your job, your relationships, the family you choose or the family that chose you, you do have the choice.  Take the time to let go a bit and really throw yourself into that happiness.  You never know what might happen!

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